Dear Charlie
Hello bearlings, I bring you a new weekly feature called " Ask Charlie". You can ask me advice about anything just send your questions to offthetelegraph@gmail.com. Here is this weeks question:
Dear Charlie,
I have a friend in one of my classes who barely bothers to show up. He asks me for my notes, which I take the time to type up neatly, basically every other class. He does the reading and uses my well organized notes and seems do be doing just as well as I am in the class. If I didn't show up class then he wouldn't have the notes for me to borrow, so it just seems unfair. This is making me bitter towards my friend, should it? What do I do?
signed,
Abused Note taker
Dear Note taker,
That is unfair. If your friend had to miss a class or two for some reason it would be totally acceptable for him to ask, but this is too much and you are being too nice. Though it may seem like a fun idea to give him fake and incorrect notes or tell him you lost yours, that could have negative consequences. Maybe you don't mind though.
Probably the best thing to do is confront your friend and let him know how you feel. He is probably unaware that you are unhappy with him and is assuming that you are taking them anyways so why not? You could say something like, " Hey man, it seems unfair that I am the one in class taking notes three days a week, maybe we could set something up where we each take notes every other class and combine them? Then we both have to do only 50% the note-taking work". If you don't trust him to do the work just tell him you don't feel comfortable giving him your work anymore if he doesn't bother to show up. The key here is to be vocal. If you hold it in you will only get angrier and either eventually blow up at him or cut him off as a friend. If you are clear and nice about explaining your feelings he should understand. If he doesn't than he is a douchebag and you probably don't need him as a friend.
-Charlie
Dear Charlie,
I have a friend in one of my classes who barely bothers to show up. He asks me for my notes, which I take the time to type up neatly, basically every other class. He does the reading and uses my well organized notes and seems do be doing just as well as I am in the class. If I didn't show up class then he wouldn't have the notes for me to borrow, so it just seems unfair. This is making me bitter towards my friend, should it? What do I do?
signed,
Abused Note taker
Dear Note taker,
That is unfair. If your friend had to miss a class or two for some reason it would be totally acceptable for him to ask, but this is too much and you are being too nice. Though it may seem like a fun idea to give him fake and incorrect notes or tell him you lost yours, that could have negative consequences. Maybe you don't mind though.
Probably the best thing to do is confront your friend and let him know how you feel. He is probably unaware that you are unhappy with him and is assuming that you are taking them anyways so why not? You could say something like, " Hey man, it seems unfair that I am the one in class taking notes three days a week, maybe we could set something up where we each take notes every other class and combine them? Then we both have to do only 50% the note-taking work". If you don't trust him to do the work just tell him you don't feel comfortable giving him your work anymore if he doesn't bother to show up. The key here is to be vocal. If you hold it in you will only get angrier and either eventually blow up at him or cut him off as a friend. If you are clear and nice about explaining your feelings he should understand. If he doesn't than he is a douchebag and you probably don't need him as a friend.
-Charlie
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